Parrots can predict when a sex scene is going to take place at the Brazzers Studios – Brian Upton

Brian Upton from Toms River, New Jersey, owns one of the most popular and successful furniture cleaning service in the city. His hobby is not writing about the furniture or its cleaning though, he mostly spends his spare time writing about sex and porn and many of his blog’s subscribers believe he is the best in it.

Brian claims on his blog that the parrots can predict when a love-making session is going to take place between two human individuals. He claims that the parrots can even predict rapes even when it is a staged rape, like in a brazzers free movie.

Brian sounds very anti-feminist when he writes that soon enough the feminists will reject all the religions because they are all man-made and feminists cannot stand those for the same.

Brian is not ashamed to admit that his wife used to be an escort in the past and one of the most high profile ones. She is a retired model as well. She claims that without exception, the judges have the stamina of a horse.

Brian says that he loves his wife’s fatty love handles.

Brian loves to read the textbooks belonging to different religions and going by the Hadiths, he claims that it has been prophesized in one of the Hadiths that the penises of the human males will be 30% larger and 40% stiffer on an average after 2032.

Brian claims to have studied the life of many top Catholic figures including Mother Teresa, St Thomas Aquinas, Fr Benedict Groeschel. He claims that Mother Teresa was even lesser a virgin than Madonna. He claims that she would participate in sexual orgies all the time and the most frequent to those orgies used to be another Catholic priest – Fr Benedict Groeschel. Brian believes that Mother Teresa never let Fr Benedict Groeschel ever fuck her in the ass although he would regularly get inside her pussy and mouth. He claims that their most favorite position used to be the ’69 position’.

Uzbeki Women today are as underrated as the BBWs in the 1960s were

Reading newspaper everyday for 2 decades, everyday, has improved only one aspect of my life which is definitely not the sex life.

I have been enjoying blonde escorts in Goa belonging to different nations for a long while now. And I have concluded that the Russian girls are overrated, Ukrainian girls are underrated and so are the Uzbekis.

I love to spend time with those 20 year old Uzbeki beauties while I am in Goa.

I have been married twice yet. My first marriage was with a divorced Arab woman who was 32 at the time of our marriage, she loved sex. My second marriage was with a 22 year old Norwegian model who hated sex. After these 2 marriages of mine, I have come to the conclusion that a blowjob from an Arab-Muslim wife is as rare as an anal session with a Norwegian wife. My Arab-Muslim wife always had her ass wide and open for my dick and my Norwegian wife always had her mouth ready to suck my dick, she didn’t enjoy vaginal sex much though.

My Arab wife bought 10 different shirts at a time in 10 different colors at once that read ‘BANG ME’. She would wear one of those each time she wanted to use sex in order to gain something financial from me.

If you are newly married or never been into a relationship before. Here is a tip from me, the horniness of a woman can be told by the depth and width of her vaginal walls. I don’t care what they would call me for stating this, but I have been working on to create a tool that will measure both the width and the length of the vaginal walls of a woman, causing her no pain, complications or side-effects at all.

I believe that the state of Wyoming in USA will be the greatest hub for casinos and brothels in the world by 2040. I am certainly going to move there by 2030 to enjoy it all.